Back Surgery can teach you a few things about yourself...

About a month ago I was sitting in a meeting at work with two vendors, talking about ways they could could get our budget money for 2009 when I felt that something wasn't quite right with me... internally. My lower back started to throb and I started getting cold sweats. Fortunately, the meeting didn't last too much longer and I was able to sit down and rest at my desk for the rest of the day.

**WARNING. VERY BORING RECAP OF MY BACK ISSUES TO FOLLOW. IF YOU'D RATHER SKIP, PLEASE PROCEED TO THE NEXT SET OF ASTERISKS MARKS**

I'm no stranger to back pain, so I chalked it up to my a long list of back ailments that come and go with me. It hurts for a few days, then it's gone in a week or so afterward. I rested on Thursday night, complaining as usual to Karli that my back did not feel right.

I woke up the next morning and I had a new type of pain/sensation. I could feel the main sciatic nerve all the way up and down my left leg. It didn't hurt when I stood or laid down, but man did it hurt when I sat.

I didn't put too much thought to it, so I got up, read scriptures and went to work as usual. Except this drive to work was not usual at all. The pain shooting up and down my leg was unbearable.... and I continually had to switch positions to make the pain less severe.

It got so bad during the drive in that I did the only feasible thing I could do at that point -- call Devin Orton, my chiropractor in training brother in law and ask him what the heck was going on with me. Hoping to just leave a message in which I whined about the pain alot, he actually picked up and he talked me in to the parking lot at OC Tanner. Telling me that I probably pinched my sciatic nerve, he told me he would send some exercises to help alleviate the pain.

At work the pain got intense, then went away - allowing me to get some important work done that morning and afternoon. I left early in the day to take my girl's soccer team to the BYU vs. William and Mary soccer game and the leg pain flared up on the drive back to Lehi and then again on the way to the BYU game.

Again, I didn't think it was too big of a deal until Saturday morning, when I woke up with a new level of pain unlike I had ever experienced. I could barely get out of bed. I could barely move. Walking especially painful and my left leg and foot were for the most part, numb.

I immediately talked to Dad who told me to relax and then gave me something for the pain. He also set me up with Dr. Bacon, and Orthopedic Surgeon who examined me on Wednesday. He instantly told me I had a big ole herniated disc, gave me a cortisone injection and scheduled an MRI.

The MRI confirmed his conclusion. After a week of no improvement the doctor told me that a herniation as big as mine can only be corrected with surgery.

Ouch. I've never had surgery before, but soon I was sitting at the Central Utah Medical Surgical Center in a cute blue gown, a blue hair net and blue socks -- ready to go under the knife.

The general anesthesia felt wonderful going in... but really sucked when I woke up.

The first thing I vaguely remember is the nurse sternly saying 'Mr Poyfair please quit rolling and thrashing like that!"

The next thing I remember was the pain. Youch. The nurse gave me a healthy dose of Demoral, that made it feel better. Except now I wanted to throw up... bad.

Karli was there every step of the way, talking to me when I was semi-conscious.. helping me to get up and walk when I had to... saying nice things to me when the pain was pretty bad.

I went home that night with a full bottle of Percaset and a big ole bandage on my back.

My recovery since then has been slow and frustrating. I've been moving around more and more, but my impatience to get back and working has been making more and more... uh... frustrated.


** END OF BORING RECAP **

In the past few weeks I've learned some very interesting things about myself.

1. Drugs make me act funny... sometimes in a bad way. Loritab gives me a feeling of being invincible and completely normal when I'm actually woozy and not controlled. During the time between my MRI and surgery, I took a few for the pain and proceeded to work as normal -- conference calls, proposals -- I even went into work one day under the influence. I shouldn't have done that. I was asked by my superiors to refrain from working while in that state.

2. My pain tolerance is a little strange -- I've never had a surgery like this before and I was interested to see how I'd take the pain. For the most part, I've thought I've taken it well. I felt that I could survive just fine without them, until yesterday at Krissy's final fall Soccer game. I decided to not take pain meds that day so that my brain would be alert and crisp and ready to coach. The only problem was that my back really hurt during the game and it made me angrier than normal. Combine that with a referee with a Napoleon complex and the result is me getting ejected from the game with a red card for dissent. Ooops. I shouldn't have gone anywhere near that game without pain meds. I really embarrassed myself.

3. I really like to work -- missing work has been hard for me. I actually can't wait to get back to working condition so I continue working again. I hate, hate, hate being laid up like this.

4. I'm super, super motivated to never have this happen again. I'm excited to start rehab, (Hear that Devin?) lose 25 pounds and strengthen my core muscles. I never, never want this to happen again. It's funny how it took me losing my health to appreciate having good health.

and for those of you who want to see what my surgery may have looked like, have a look...



Wasn't that gross? I was only able to stomach about 25 seconds of it.

Fall Soccer season is over -- As some of you know, I signed on to coach Krissy's U-11, Double AA soccer team this year. This team plays in the Northern Utah County League and gets to travel around the county. We play a fall season and a spring season and it's been a total blast so far.

We started playing about a month ago in a tournament in Riverton. We started out by playing the defending state champions for our age group and got destroyed 10-0. After the game I had to talk 12 sobbing 11 year olds off the ledge. The next day we played another tough team and only lost 3-0. The following day we played another tough team and tie them 0-0.

As we started our fall season we lost to our cross town rivals 3-1, then the girls started to go on a winning tear. It was cool to watch them come together as a team, overcome their fear of scoring and start overpowering each and every team we played. Until yesterday's unfortunate loss, they had won eight games in a row and finished the season 8-2 -- Not bad for a team that didn't play together before this year and had several players who had never played before.

Kristen has been one of the stars on offense. She has an uncanny knack for dribbling down the sidelines and crossing the ball into the middle with relative ease. She's scored several goals and has benefited from finally playing on a team where her skills complement other good players on the team as well.


At the end of each of our games this year, we gave one of the girls a Fuzzy, stuffed, Garrett the Carrot . They were a huge hit with the girls and at Saturday's game I was presented with this T-shirt from the girls. I loved it!

Here's our awesome team.

Here's our awesome team being silly. Notice my red tongue.


Dustin is also playing on a club team this fall. They play six on six on a shorter field, have real referees and real uniforms and a real coach who cares about if they play their position or not. It's been good for the little guy. Right now, the team he plays for it getting beat up on pretty good by some of the other teams, but he seems to enjoy the opportunity to play.
Dustin's left foot helps him dribble into places others just can't defend.

What better thing to do while sitting on the bench than wrestle with the other boys sitting on the bench.
Dustin plays peacefully.

And he's good too.
Katelyn is finishing up her Rec league volleyball season and has also shown constant, steady improvement. She holds her own in this league, contributing many important plays and learning a lot of the fundamentals. I'm proud of her for working so hard to get better at sports - she's doing an absolutely awesome job.
Kate returning a shot.
Here's Kate getting ready to return another serve. Her good friend Annie is behind her.



Dallin went to the Killers concert last night -- his first rock concert ever (If memory serves me correctly, he's been to Ryan Shupe and the Rubberband before). He went with his good friend Reuben Holdaway and his father, Adam Holdaway.

Dallin has been an avid Killers fan since he got his first Ipod. He owns all their CD's, knows all about them (the lead singer is Mormon you know), and even owns a Killers T-shirt that he proudly wears to school.

I wish I could have went with him, but our musical tastes are pretty well aligned and we'll go see other concerts together.

And finally, there's Karli. What an angel she's been to me this past month. She's had to deal with a whiny, complaining husband that's been absolutely no use around the house for the past month. She's been my personal nurse, housekeeper and friend during what has become a very frustrating month for me. She just continues to do what she can to contribute to our family. She is working six hours a day at a pretty challenging job at the school, then has had to come home to take care of the all the workings of our family and also care for her wounded husband.

I married her over 17 years ago because I knew she was much better than me and that I needed that at that time. This equation has changed some over the years, but she remains the strength, the hardest working, strongest willed person I've ever met and I'm so glad I'm married to her.

How about a little self deprecation? Anyone who knows me well understands that I have a problem when it comes to having photos taken of me. I've never met a photographed smile of mine that I've liked.

A few weeks ago I told Karli to take some pictures of me coaching the my girls soccer team. She took five photos, and this is what she came up with.


1. I call this one 'Happy old man.' The glasses, the clapping.

2. I call this one 'The Happy Sneeze.'


3. This is me clapping again. In this one I'm not a crazy cackling lunatic.


4. This is me thinking real hard. With my eyes closed.



5. And the grand prize goes to this one. Eyes closed, nose shriveled, tongue sticking out. It's hard to have all of that going for you in one shot.